I was asked to bring this up in more detail so this is dedicated to the person asking.
X – hey we connect real good. Maybe hang out sometime?
Y – well, I would but you’re to old for me. I need someone around my age.
X – why do you need someone around your age? That shouldn’t matter.
Y – because I just do. Sorry but I can’t date someone x years older than me.
Seems familiar? These days society acts like unless you’re within a certain age range, you and the other person can’t be in a relationship. When asked why, here’s the typical responses:
Feels like dating a parent/child
They can’t find someone their own age
Financial gain (dating someone because they have money)
Lack of common interests
The older person might die before the younger one
Some friend/relative said so
Here’s the reality – who cares?! Why should a relationship matter if it’s within legal means? So what if someone is a 20+ year gap? Are they happy? Is there signs of manipulation? Have they been married before (deaths don’t count, or widow/er)?
Apparently there’s some unwritten rule of taking your age, half it, and add 7. This is your supposed age range. Who comes up with this garbage? Are unhappy couples that upset to force their ideas on someone else?
What’s the root issue of this topic – society. We talk so much about what needs to change, yet at the same time the majority refuses to change their ways. The few of us who do change tend to be outspoken by those who talk the loudest just to be heard; not because they 100% believe what they’re actually saying with solid evidence.
Let’s revisit the convo –
X – want to hang out sometime?
Y – I would but you’re outside my age range.
X – would you rather be happy or date someone just because they’re within your age? You yourself said the X of your age range aren’t as mature.
Y – I’m sorry I just can’t.
X – who do you know are outside their age range and still together?
Y – (thinks) well my relative has been married X years and they’re X years apart.
X – and that’s your favorite relative, correct?
Y – yes.
X – then what’s the issue?
Y – (thinks again) you know, you’re right. Let’s give the relationship a chance.
Here’s a list of current celebrities with age gaps. Notice how some are still married/together after years/decades of being together?
Bottom line – just because someone is older/younger than you, means nothing. What matters is if you’re happy, they’re happy, and you found someone who share the same common interests. If opposites attract, this is one variant, age.